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August 27, 2006

Ten Years Ago Today, I Went Out To Conquer the World

by Joshua Minton

...by leaving my home to go to college. It was my second freshman year, having left the University of Cincinnati a year earlier in a maelstrom quarter life crisis which ended with me breaking ties with my fraternity brothers, dropping out of school and undergoing a spiritual conversion on the level of tectonic plate shifts in the earth.

My God, ten years ago I left with a fire in my mind that was going to burn the earth to cinder. Ten years ago today, I stood holding my guitar case in front of Kohl Hall in Bowling Green State University after having told my parents goodbye. My hair was down to my shoulders and I didn't bathe much. I had a Dugout full of marijuana in my jean shorts pocket which I wasted no time digging into and lighting up in full view of everyone. I was fearless and reckless and stoned, a dangerous combination for a suburanite white boy with a heavy intelligence and a dangerously ambitious lust for power and fame.

I would spend that entire Freshman year stoned on pot with periodic bouts of sobriety that felt uncomfortable and awkward.

If you would have asked me ten years ago where I'd be ten years from then--I probably would have told you I'd be looking out the window of my compound on the Moon, surveying my army of spiritual storm troopers who had conquered earth and finally escaped its surly bonds of gravity to bring the glowing presence of humanity into the outer reaches of our solar system--the progenitor of a terraforming race of humanity who, after solving all the earth's problems, turned his attention to the final frontier.

Let's blame that delusion of grandeur on too much pot mixed with too much Star Trek and Krishnamurti, shall we?

But seriously, I was a kid. I would be twenty-one a week from moving into a Freshman dorm, one of the only two residents who could legally purchase and consume alcohol in a dormitory of 18 year olds. I should have been getting laid like flowers at the feet of a Hawaiian prom queen--and I could have but I had other shit on my mind. Things like fixing all the bullshit problems we had created for ourselves as a species.

Call it a Jesus complex. Call it short man's megalomania. Call it a hefty ego backed up by an above average penis size. Call it what you want. There was a fire in my mind and heart which has been raging to this very day and which still may help save the world inside my soul (which is the only one that ultimately matters to each of us).

Many have been scorched in the flames of perdition which lie inside me and a few might have been healed but I am the one who came out on the winning side of this past decade.

I found the best woman for me in the world. She grounded me and brought me back to reality from the edge of madness. We have a life together, children together. I have a career. Who ever would have thought that I would be so good at business, at understanding the intricacies of how human beings can best exchange goods and services with each other so that both profit most in the long run?

And I'm stone sober nowadays. Too sober sometimes.

Ten years is a long time for us but merely a speck on the cosmic calendar. It takes Saturn thirty years to go around the Sun so it's only a third of the way along its revolutionary path since the time I stood outside Kohl Hall only ten years ago.

But that's the thing about revolutions--they always come back around. And madness, like sobriety, is a sparse and wicked mole who tunnels for years only to pop its head above the surface at the most inconvenient times.

And that dreamer who raged against machine and man alike ten years ago will likely reawaken again someday in my lifetime. And don't be surprised if, as an old man, you ask me where I'll be ten years from then and you get a quibbling and ridiculous answer about storm troopers on the moon.

NOTES: Okay, the photo. Upper left is what I looked like on the day I moved into Kohl Hall. Upper right is me at a costume party with the girl I was trying to bang at the time (I think her name was Julie and it didn't work--she was just using me for my astronomy notes). Lower left is my fraternity picture, included for the mere embarrassment of hair style. Lower right is my first legally purchased alcoholic beverage, a Long Island Iced Tea. It was purchased and consumed at Easy Street Cafe on Main Street in Bowling Green, OH.

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August 25, 2006

One Year Ago Today, I Asked "If Maybe Is All We Have Left..."

by Joshua Minton

...then we don't have much at all.

But since when does our country hinge on maybe?

The Democratic Party is no longer the party of Andrew Jackson and segregation. They no longer dress up in white sheets (except maybe Robert Byrd) and turn fire hoses and German Shepherds on black school kids trying to get equal voting rights.

And the Republican Party is no longer the Party of Lincoln, the party that barely held the last best hope for mankind together so that it didn't perish from the face of the Earth.

I wouldn't be surprised to find out that both parties were being run from the same corporate bank account. This statement isn't just pissing in the wind because corporate entities (meaning companies as well as "Non-Profit" religous entities and special interest groups) have taken control of our political process and are not going to let go until we excise them with ruthless and effective measures.

No one can question the integrity of the American citizen. Our culture may have become extremely pussified since the counter-culture of the 60s let thoughts of love and peace overshadow the need to duck when someone throws a sucker punch at us but the blood of the patriot still flows in every person's veins in this country and one need look no further than the national momentum of solidarity that followed the 9/11 attacks as proof.

But as we learned, this solidarity through struggle doesn't last long and breaks apart very soon like The Friendship is about to in the Big Brother house (I still can't believe that bitch Jennifer stabbed Kaysar in the back like that).

In the year 1913, at the 50th anniversary of the battle of Gettysburg, surviving veterans of that war camped out for a three-day celebration that saw Confederates breaking bread and sharing stories with their once sworn Yankee enemies. The highlight of the event was a recreation of General Pickett's tragic charge that led to the massacre of his entire division by Union soldiers behind a well-fortified, low stone wall.

After three days of comraderie, 50 years after three days of the tragic murder of 43,000 Americans by other Americans (compare this to the numbers coming out of Iraq after two years of fighting), the veterans were fellow citizens again. And when the rebels began the charge and began yelling the rebel yell for the first time in that hallowed ground since the original massacre, the Union soldiers threw down their arms, jumped over the stone wall, and ran to embrace their brothers from the south.

Just thinking of these old men in their ragged uniforms with 50-year-old bullet holes, running to embrace each other on the field where they lost their youths makes my spine tingle and tears threaten even now...

I believe that we can still have that camraderie even when you, as my fellow citizen, insult the President I voted for and who I think has done light years better than his predecessor who brought shame and disgrace to our nation and allowed a very dangerous enemy to take form and amass the means to murder three thousand of our fellow countrymen.

But I refuse to hinge my future upon maybe.

Men and women of honor take control of their circles of influence and effect positive change by acting from a center of integrity toward those around them.

Justice begins at home and flows from the way we talk to and the things we think about the face in the mirror in the morning. If we can't be civil to that person then how in God's name do we expect to create a civil society.

How can we be shocked to find the world in the state it is today when we are so fragmented inside our own minds, hearts, and spirits that most of us wouldn't run to hug ourselves if we saw our shadow walking alone across a deserted street?

My mother used to say begin by cleaning up your own backyard before you tell other people how to make their lawn greener and cleaner. This is still good advice in any situation.

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August 23, 2006

The Marijuana Pipe Dream: When Will We Finally Concede The War on Drugs?

by Joshua Minton



The Government says that we are losing the War on Drugs. Do you know what that implies? That means there is a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it! What's that tell you about drugs right there? There's some smart creative people on that side; they're winning a war and they're fucked up!
--The Prophet William Melvin Hicks 1961-1994--

Now, dont' you feel safer knowing that a ruthless and cold-blooded farmer who was out to do damage to you and your property is now in prison for five years and has had a $400,000 fine leveraged on him?

Don't you feel safer? Oh, you want to know what he did? I'm reticent to even speak about such a horrible act. Well, if you must know and you're sure you can handle it...he grew marijuana. Shh. Don't tell anyone. I know. I know. Right here in our country. They should plug his anus with concrete and feed him Skyline chili mixed with Exlax, right?

I would like to know, right now, where the breaking point is when the United States Government's War on Drugs finally collapses under the weight of its own ignorance and malfeasance towards the exercised free will of individuals. Because I know it's out there like I know that China exists: I've never been there to see it but I've eaten enough Chinese food to know the shit ain't made up.

And when I talk about drugs, I mean marijuana. You can keep all the other bullshit. The cocaine, the heroin, the LSD, the mush...well, I'll keep the mushrooms. So, I've got the mushrooms and the marijuana on my side of the argument and you can take all the other schedule-whatever drugs, ball them up, and shoot them into the sun for all I care.

But marijuana and mushrooms have never directly hurt anyone or their property and, in fact, when used properly; they have freed minds which would have otherwise been enslaved and over-burdened by reality. Drugs have made the world a better place, maaaan!

I don't personally indulge in substance abuse any more and haven't since college but I had a good time in my youth and I never landed in jail, robbed, raped or went through whatever dark gateway to harder drugs that these Republicans keep talking about when they talk about pot.

And if you need further proof of the government's two-faced hypocrisy on this issue--earlier this year, the FDA outright rejected marijuana for medical use but yet, in 1985, this same agency authorized Marinol, the synthetic derivative of delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) as effective in:
the treatment of: (1) anorexia associated with weight loss in patients with AIDS; and (2) nausea and vomiting associated with cancer chemotherapy in patents who have failed to respond adequately to conventional antiemetic treatments.
Everyone knows that pot makes you feel better and if you're one of those people who got totally paranoid and lost your mind after you smoked it; you either weren't doing it with the right people in the right environment or you're a total creep anyway.

I long for a day when I can go to the local tobacco shop and buy a bag of Grade-A premium Kentucky homegrown kind buds, some rolling papers, a nice big blunt, or save it for a water pipe (purchased legally because the Feds will no longer be wasting time and tax-payer money hunting down and hindering the exercised free choice of its citizens and instead put all their resources into actually finding and stopping terrorists and others who seek to do actual harm to the bodies and property of the United States citizens).

I want to be able to smile at the teller as I'm purchasing my weed, have them say, "We just got this shipment in and it's fresh and sticky. I just smoked some on my lunch break." I then want her to open the bag and say, "Just look at the purple hairs on those buds." And I'll smile and say thank you. And I'll open the bag, stick my nose in and inhale that wonderful smell as I pass a cop coming into the store who says nothing to me because I'm not breaking any bullshit laws put in place by low men in gray flannel suits who spend their time thinking up obstacles for the common man to hurdle over in their pursuit of a happiness unfettered by pin-headed beauracratic overlords.

I want pot farmers to be one of the most revered occupations in the world. I want to see global conferences of pot growers, sharing the best seeds to grow the best strains of the weed which grows everywhere and serves a thousand different functions, all of them positive.

When this happens, maybe the rest of the world will stop laughing at us when we call ourselves The Land of the Free.

NOTES:
  • Unfortunately, the gold teeth on the cat in the picture are real. Some dentist with too much time and too much money apparently wanted his feline to sport the Master P grill. Don't believe me? I couldn't make this shit up.
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August 22, 2006

Dark Matter Pisses Me Off and Why I Think It's Wrong as a Cosmological Constant

by Joshua Minton



I spend so much time tearing down religious and social institutions on this blog that I rarely turn my hydra-headed attention span to the world of science so excuse me while I fix my sniper scope here. Ok, got it. In the crosshairs today are the astronomers and cosmologists who are searching relentlessly for proof of "dark matter" which is needed in order to justify the current scientific model of the Universe.

Scientists are some of the most hard-headed sumbitches on the planet--way more hard headed than even our President whose head is made out of granite and whose will to change is as obstinate as a Viagra hard on at the Moonlight Bunny Ranch.

Scientists don't like change which is why Einstein, to justify his model of the Universe, came up with some bullcheet he called The Cosmological Constant in order to keep a stationary universe as the hub of his scientific worldview. He was as wrong as whatever dumb ass movie studio decided to remake Adventures in Babysitting as a black (as in people) comedy. Einstein was wrong because the galaxies are in motion and in fact are gaining speed the further they progress in time and distance.

So he was wrong. It happens. Geniuses fuck up. Brilliant men cheat on their wives and ruin their families all because the brain in the little head thinks in microwaves while the brain in the big head thinks in the radio portion of the spectrum.

But here's the thing that none of these astronomers are thinking about--light moves in both particles and waves and a wave is spread out. Perhaps the galaxies we see as distinct and separate are spread out as well.

Consider what would happen if we accepted the notion that the Universe is much smaller than we believe it is and what seems to be "billions and billions" of galaxies are actually thousands and thousands but we are looking at the entire period of their movement in time from one single vantage point--this moment!

This would account for the missing matter in the universe and show that things are as they should be mass-wise without having to go to the basement and pull some stinky shit called "dark matter" out of our arses in order to explain why birds fly and babies cry.

Perhaps we are seeing the same galaxy at different points in space and time and our senses are telling us they are distinct but in actuality it is the same matter in different stages of progression through time.

So while it may seem that the universe is huge; perhaps we are once again limited by our senses and by the structure of thought which is deeply rooted in time and founded upon the division of objects into temporal phenomenality.

It is possible that the Universe is much smaller and far more intimate that we have given it credit for--but we may just have to step outside our own egos in order to see it.

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August 21, 2006

BWP On Homelessness and the Futility of Global Altruism

by Joshua Minton

The only time I consider the comfort of the homeless is when I let my dog outside for the last time at night, before going to bed. I open the sliding glass door to my home, feel the temperature as I'm grabbing for the chain and imagine how the cool or the heat feels on the dirty faces of the beard stubbled homeless of Columbus, OH. For some reason, they are always stocking-capped in my mind--even if it's hot outside. I see them in the blazing sun with an orange stocking cap, standing on the freeway exit with whatever signs they come up with and my pity for them only extends to their exposure to the weather.

Sometimes life is a matter of simply showing up, being present when opportunity arises. Did you know that if France had just shown up and looked like an army when Hitler crossed the Rhine in 1937, that the German generals were given orders to immediately retreat?

All they had to do was show up.

Where does this drive for global altruism come from? The Christian Golden Rule? Even a cursory glance at the history of Western society will prove unequivocally that Christians with military power have done everything but live by the Golden Rule.

I think this is an important question because we are currently fighting a war based on the precept that we are pre-ordained as a nation with a mission to free the individuals of the world from tyranny of all sorts.

But what about the tyranny of the symbol? What about the murder that the idea demands? Pick an idea. Pick a symbol. Whether it's a flag or a cross or an idea of 72 virgins in paradise; it all equals violence.

So maybe I am cold and callous in my brief thoughts of the homeless in my own city when I let my dog out into the night to crap another load I'll have to pick up when I mow that weekend; but at least my egotistical ignorance of their plight doesn't end in murdering them to save their souls or displacing them because the truth of the modern world dictates that the ground they stand on is more valuable than their presence on this planet.

So who is really lying to themselves?

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August 19, 2006

Boys Wear Pants on Prison Break Season 1

by Joshua Minton

I missed the first four shows when this was on television so I deliberately held out until it came out on DVD. I'm glad I did because it sucks waiting for a week for these serial cliff hanger shows like this and 24.

This is one holy mother humper of a great show. The writing, the acting, the cinematography are top notch. You've got to hand it to Fox because in a world where HBO no rules applied television is kicking the shit out of the major networks' ridiculous sit-coms and boring criminal investigation shows; Fox continues to raise the bar on high-intensity dramas that have novel subject matter and clear voices behind the execution.

Everything about this show is cool. The main characer, Michael Scofield is an obsessive-compulsive do gooder who has to bust his brother out of prison where he's being contained until his death by electrocution for murdering the brother of the female Vice President. It turns out his brother was framed as part of a huge conspiracy involving an X-Files type elite group of people in suits who secretly run the world behind the veneer of democracy.

But that part is cliche. We've heard that story before and luckily, it's just the periphery.

The real draw of this show is why Michael Scofield, a structural engineer whose firm helped redesign the very prison his brother is incarcerated in, decides to tattoo the blueprints of the prison and the details of his plans to break out with his brother all over his chest, back and arms.


From the first minute of the first episode, the tension in this show ratchets up, releases a little, then ratchets up even more. It is fascinating how Michael draws the right people around and alternates his plan to fit changing circumstances, avoiding detection, avoiding being murdered by other inmates, takes pills to lower his insulin so he can gain access to the infirmay as a diabetic patient to receive daily insulin injections in order to further the plan for his brother's escape, all the while the conspiracy which put his brother there in the first place rages out of control in the highest corridors of power in the nation.

People, this is top-notch entertainment and I salute the creators, writers, directors, and especially the actors who, while hardened criminals, convince us that there is still the heart of human beings inside child murderers, rapists, thieves, and the conspiratorially framed.

I can't wait until Season 2 starts this coming Monday and I highly recommend you purchase the first series. You won't be sorry.

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August 18, 2006

Why Supporting a Third Party Candidate is NOT a Waste of a Vote

by Joshua Minton


Have you ever been verbally accosted by an aggressive Republican? Democrats accost too but not as viciously as Republicans. Well, I used to be one of those nasty shameless Republican voters who confronted everyone I knew about their political views.

I am no longer that person. Now I set traps for them, gut them mentally and roast their bones over an open flame.

When an aggressive Bush lover confronts me, I begin by riffing on Bill Hicks. I say:
Do you know what politics are like in America?

[Simulate puppets with both hands talking to each other]

Left Puppet: "I think the puppet on the left agrees with me!"

Right puppet: "Well, I think the puppet on the right shares my views."

Offstage Voice: "Hey, wait a minute! There's one guy holding up both puppets!"

[Right puppet breaks character and speaks to audience]

Right puppet: "SHUT UP! Go back to bed America, there is nothing to see here. THREAT LEVEL ORANGE! THREAT LEVEL RED! There's a woman with a vaseline and a screwdriver on an airplane. OH MY GOD, SHE'S GOT A NOTE!"

Left puppet: "Wait, that's just a hoax!"

Right puppet [Kicking left puppet off stage]: "SHUT UP! Be afraid. Be afraid. You will die. You will die...if you don't vote Republican. Vote Republican!"

Voice Under: This message was paid for by the Republican National Committee and brought to you by Fox News.
See, I'm sick and tired of being told that unless I vote for a political machine that my vote is being wasted. I voted a straight Republican ticket for the past eight years and they have SHAMED me! More money is being spent on more bullshit under this administration than any previous in history. We are at war and, supposedly, aren't supposed to feel any safer five years later than on 9/10/2001. Hell, World War II didn't even last this long for America and our weapons were archaic back then compared to now.

No, no more. I'm voting my core values from this point on and if my candidate loses, he (or she) is going to do it with my support.

And any big mouth Republicans or Democrats who try and step up to talk shit are going to learn why my American hero is Patrick Henry and not Ronald Reagan.

"I take seven emcees, put 'em in a line. Then add seven more brothas who think they can rhyme. And it'll take seven more before I go for mine. Now that's 21 emcees ate up at the same time."


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August 17, 2006

BWP Blogcast #108: Bill Peirce and the Freedom to Prosper, Josh Interviews the Libertarian Candidate for Governor of Ohio

by Joshua Minton


CLICK THE PLAY BUTTON TO LISTEN TO THE BLOGCAST



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Welcome to a special edition of the Boys Wear Pants blogcast. This is an election edition. I have a special guest on the program; his name is Bill Peirce [pronounced “Purse”] and he is currently running for the Libertarian candidate for Ohio Governor. Just to give you a little bit of introduction here; Bill grew up in Lexington, Massachusetts where his ancestor Solomon Peirce was wounded in the famous first battle of the American Revolution. He was an Eagle Scout and earned a BA in Economics from Harvard University. He then went on to study at the American Institute for Economic Research, eventually earning his PhD in Economics from Princeton University. He is currently Professor Emeritus of Economics at Case Western Reserve University where he is also the chair of that department. Bill has written several articles and books, among them one titled “Bureaucratic Failure and Public Expenditure.” He has been married for 40 years, has three grown children and a granddaughter.


Josh: Bill, welcome and thank you so much for agreeing to do this.

Bill: Well, thanks Josh for inviting me.

[There was a story on the Columbus news about candidates using MySpace pages to attract voters and Bill was named as the candidate having the most friends on MySpace. Your humble host is proud to be included as one of those MySpace friends.]

Josh: Well, I guess I owe you some congratulations. You made some pretty big news in Columbus here yesterday. You finally made the news actually. I saw that your MySpace article came up and people can go to your website and watch the actual clip but that is a huge advance for a third-party candidate to actually be mentioned and named on the news and I think its an outstanding accomplishment.

Bill: Yeah, well one of my good volunteers has worked very hard on that and I’m glad we were successful on that front.

Josh: Absolutely. I’ve been following your candidacy since you announced it last year and I can really feel some momentum building up there so I’m happy to have you on the show and to talk about some of the things that you’re standing for and some of the ways that you’re going to change Ohio for the better.

Josh: So, let’s talk about Eminent Domain and Bogus Blight. This is one of those things that just gets me fired up. The first time I ever heard about it was on a John Stossel report a few years back and I know it’s one of your big issues also. I’d like to introduce the topic by introducing a quote from Supreme Court Justice George Sutherland. A long time ago, he said
It is not the right of property which is protected, but the right to property. Property, per se, has no rights; but the individual--the man--has three great rights, equally sacred from arbitrary interference: the right to his life, the right to his liberty, the right to his property…The three rights are so bound together as to be essentially one right. To give a man his life but deny him his liberty, is to take from him all that makes his life worth living. To give him his liberty but take from him the property which is the fruit and badge of his liberty, is to still leave him a slave.
To me, that says it all. Eminent Domain is when the government seizes your land and pays you a value for it that you have no leverage in setting the price for and then leaves you without your property which, as Justice Sutherland said, is an extension of your liberty and life and it cannot be separated except through tyrannical means of taking it away. So, tell me your feelings and plans on how to battle this, what I consider to be an egregious violation of personal liberty.

Bill: Well, first of all, I agree with you that it is egregious. And as I’ve traveled around the state, it’s something that strikes fear in the hearts of lots of ordinary people—that the government is going to come and take their land for some reason or no reason or to give it to somebody else and it really is outrageous.

We had a favorable decision in the Norwood Case and the good people, Carl and Joy Gamble and Joy Horney, who had fought this for years with the help of the Institutes of Justice, were able to reclaim their property in Norwood outside Cincinnati. But that’s not the end of it. There are still problems because the court ruled specifically that the state could still take land because it is “blighted.” They couldn’t take it because it was deteriorating but they could take it if it was blighted.

Josh: What exactly is “blighted?”

Bill: Yeah, well that’s the problem.

[Laughter]

Bill: I think blight is in the eye of the beholder. The Eminent Domain Task Force of the Legislature has worked on this during the year and there are some good people on that but they weren’t able to put in a really tight definition of blight and the Legislature is going to have to work on it.

But I think as long as that standard is in there at all, we’re in trouble because blight ends up being defined the way it was in the Lakewood case where the house is blighted if it doesn’t have a bathroom on the first floor or if the driveway is two ribbons of pavement with grass in between (which is what every environmentalist tells us we should have). And so on down the line, there are all these really arbitrary and artificial standards: the houses are too close together (which the New Urban people tell us is what we should want).

So it really becomes a matter of what is current urban planning fashion rather than something concrete. And it’s easy to go to the extremes and say, “If somebody is not paying his taxes, the house is collapsing and nobody is claiming it, then it’s blighted.” But you don’t need a blight standard for that because we have ordinary procedures for dealing with abandonment of property and foreclosure if people don’t pay their taxes. And maybe those should be tightened up or speed up so that the places don’t’ sit there for years—but that’s a separate issue.

When we’re talking about blight and Eminent Domain, we’re talking about somebody who is living in a house and the city comes along and says, “No, we don’t want you living there because…the paint’s peeling.”

Josh: Do you think there are malicious forces behind that, you know, wanting to tear down and put up a shopping mall 9 times out of 10?

Bill: Yeah, there certainly are these forces and if, once you say to a developer, “Gee, if you want that property, just pay for a study and show that it’s blighted and we’ll take it for you;” then you set things up so that it can be very, very unsavory.

What’s to prevent an unscrupulous developer from bribing the city officials? Now, I’m not saying that happens every time but if you set up the situation that is really conducive to bribery then certainly it’s going to happen sometime.

Josh: Agreed. Agreed. So, do you think it’s a matter of public education on one hand, letting people learn about what Eminent Domain is and then, on the other hand, also attacking it through the Legislature and setting up barrier and stop gaps so that doesn’t happen?

Bill: I think we’re going to need a Constitutional Amendment. I’m worried about the Legislative approach. We have several people in the Legislature who are pretty good on this issue now and they might get a good bill through but two or three years from now, when nobody’s looking, that could be amended very, very quietly so that you’d never know what hit you.

The other problem is that the court decision said that you can’t take property solely for economic development purposes but it wasn’t clear what else you had to add to it. I think that, very quickly, there will be a whole industry of consultants who can say, “All right, we want this for economic development but we can add these items to it and it will get through the courts.”

Josh: So the loophole finders?

Bill: Yeah, the loophole finders. And very soon, you get a whole industry of who have all the right words in their word processors and they can just crank out these studies and we’re no more protected than we were before the Norwood case.

Josh: Right. Well, I think it’s an enormously important issue and hopefully people will wake up and realize that every state is dealing with this problem right now, not just Ohio.

Bill: Yeah, that’s right and whenever I’ve gone around the state talking to people, I think that at least 95% of the population of the state wants to have more protection and the only people who don’t want that protection are the politicians who are scared of the developers who have a lot of money to contribute and also of the urban planners, the big city economic development people and that whole group who think they need Eminent Domain in order to make the cities grow. And that’s just demonstrably wrong—these big economic development projects bulldoze a renewal; it just hasn’t worked.

Josh: This just kills me because, as a Libertarian, this is one of those times when you say, “Yes, the government should be stepping in right here but they’re void, they’re absent, they’re gone.

Bill: Yeah, well government is supposed to protect our rights and life, liberty, property and all those rights like free speech and free press and freedom of assembly and so on. That’s the role of government. But not to take away property.

Josh: Whenever anyone asks me what a Libertarian is, I just give them a one sentence response and say, “You know what? I believe that citizens should be protected for their life and their property and they should be [prevented] from infringing upon the life and property of other people—that’s what government does. If it goes beyond that, it’s in the realm of some kind of tyrannical gray zone.

Bill: Well, you can say, “Get together and do something like build a road or have a city hall or something. So there is room for a little bit more but the basic, legitimate function of government is to protect individual rights.

Josh: So the law, in other words, is like each individual giving up a little bit of their right to defend their life and property for the greater collective good and that law should also serve that same function.

Bill: Right, right.

Josh: But does it anymore?

Bill: Well, we certainly don’t want anarchy; that isn’t very comfortable for anyone—even very strong people with big guns have to look behind them all the time in anarchy. So there is a role for government but it should be just a small part of our lives, just looking out for our rights and then getting out of the way so that we can live as we want to live.

Josh: I know we romanticize the pre-Civil War era here in America but you almost have to wonder what it was like to be an American citizen back then in their relation to the government. I mean, it was nothing pretty much; it wasn’t an entity that dealt very much in the normal lives of people at all. But since then, it’s pervasive.

Bill: Yeah, and of course the role of the Federal government has changed most markedly. I have a friend, also a Libertarian, who grew up on a farm in Tennessee in the 1930s and 40s and he said that you hardly even knew that there was a Federal government around.

Josh: Wow!

Bill: And then in the 30s, you started to get all the agricultural interferences and various other things but it has really changed since then. Now, of course the state government hasn’t changed as much except that its’ now spending a lot more and therefore is able to interfere with our lives a lot more.

Josh: I know coming up and getting into politics; I never really thought of the state government as being that important. I mean, you vote, as Archie Bunker said, “I only vote in the big elections!” You know, “I only vote for the President and everything else can go by the wayside.” But as I’ve grown older, I’ve realized that your local and your state government is really where everything happens. That’s what affects your life more than even the Federal stuff.

Bill: Yeah, it does in a lot of ways. And I think a lot of people pay attention to local government because it is so close and you’re likely to know a councilman or somebody like that, school board member and, of course, the national government gets all the attention in the TV news but the state really goes along under the radar which I think is a special danger; especially now that the state has so much money to spend.

Because you don’t really know what’s going on in the legislature. If you have a bill that sounds very good like a Consumer Protection Bill or something to prevent predatory lending, you know it has a nice ring to it. But you don’t really know unless you study very, very carefully what goes on in each paragraph of that bill, whether the net effect is to make it easier for predatory lenders to take your property or whether it is to protect you from them.

Josh: And as we came to find out after 9/11; few of the Senators and Congressmen even read the bills that they sign anyway.

Bill: Right and I think that might be the solution, to require that they read the bills before they vote on them.

Josh: Maybe we can get it on audio book for them and sit them down in their cars and make them listen to it on their way to Congress.

Bill: Yeah, yeah.

Josh: Alright, well let’s move on to tax reform because I’ve got to tell you that I was very excited when I read your platform on tax reform because I’m a huge proponent of the Fair Tax Bill on the federal level (which is H.R. 25); it was a subject of a book by Neil Boortz, the famous Libertarian talk show host, and John Linder, Congressman from Georgia. Again, I was excited when I read your tax reform because it’s a comprehensive plan. It’s got tax cuts and reduction in spending and waste that, to me, makes the Republican strategy look like one of Stalin’s five-year plans. It makes them look that backward. So, tell us about your vision of what the tax structure of Ohio is going to look like under a Peirce governorship.

Bill: Well, we do have to cut taxes. It’s shameful that we’re on the wrong end of all these lists. If you look at the rankings of states according to tax burdens as a percentage of personal income or economic freedom or the environment for starting a business and growing it or business tax environment and if you look at the rate of economic growth and the rate of personal income growth, we’re at the wrong end of all these rankings. I think we’re at the wrong end of the economic growth rankings because we’re at the wrong end of the tax rankings and the economic freedom rankings.

So, yes we have to cut taxes and I would start, definitely, with getting rid of the Commercial Activities Tax that was just put in during the last budget because we’re not yet dependent on it. We can still get rid of it without too much pain.

Josh: Explain that because I was pretty shocked when I read about it. I had never heard about that until I read about it on your site.

Bill: Yeah, well it just kind of sneaked in but it is a tax on the gross income of all firms whether it’s a little ma and pa shop, a proprietorship, or a huge corporation. So, right now it’s a small percentage of gross income. No deduction. And a lot of the small business people didn’t object because right now there’s a $150,000 exemption and so the very small people miss it and then there’s a flat amount until you get up to a million. But those things can all be changed very quickly when the state runs into budgetary problems. So I think it’s short sighted not to object right away. And because it’s a tax on gross income or gross sales; it doesn’t take very long if you’re a small contractor with a couple of employees and buying for materials, you’re up over $150,000 very, very quickly and no deductions for anything.

So, it’s a very dangerous tax because people say, “Well, you know, it’s a quarter of 1%”-- but another few years from now, there’s a budget problem, “Well, we’ll just nudge this up another ¼ of a percent.” But if you look at some of the retail stores, for example, supermarkets—¼ of 1% or 1%--that’s a huge part of their total margins! Trucks are pulling up to the loading platforms and pushing the stuff in and people are hauling it out in shopping carts. It’s just moving so quickly and they work on very small margins.

Josh: Well, [the Commercial Activities Tax] was even applied on services as well, right?

Bill: …applied on services, that’s right.

Josh: If you’re an accountant that just does taxes for a small group of people or a few companies, that could really affect you.

Bill: Well, suppose that you’re one of the new style businesses where you try to outsource everything. You’re running a one-person operation out of your house.

Josh: The Delegation Firm.

Bill: Yeah, and you just outsource everything but you do have these billings that are large, even though it’s all being paid out to your subcontractors or suppliers or whatever. So you can be clobbered with that very quickly.

Josh: And you’re also going to eliminate the rest of the Estate Tax too?

Bill: Yes. That serves no function at all at the state level. It generates very little income for the state. People can argue about Estate Taxes at the Federal level but at the state level all it does is to drive the wealthier people to establish a legal residence in Florida

Josh: Sure. Sure. [laughs] It’s more like a slap in the face that serves no function whatsoever except maybe a talking point for class warfare people. Okay, that makes sense. So what else above and beyond the Republican tax cuts that are planned, what else above and beyond are you going to do?

Bill: Well, I want to talk some about the reform of the property tax. Because, right now if you look across the board at all the taxes that we levy, we do levy, or we can levy; nearly all of them do a lot of damage to the economy. Income taxes are probably the worst because they inhibit people from earning income and isn’t that what we want people to do?

And sales taxes are not nearly as bad but you still are not really interested in cutting sales. But if you turn to the property tax as it’s administered now, it’s really two things. It’s a tax on buildings and a tax on land. And the tax on buildings is damaging because if you tax people for improving the building or building a new building, they’re less likely to do it. And if you tax them high enough on buildings, they let them run down and eventually the building moves away because it depreciates and nobody rebuilds it.

But if you tax land, it can’t go anywhere. It’s stuck So you can tax land and exempt the building and that creates an incentive for people to develop the property. If they’re holding vacant land or land in the middle of the city with crummy buildings on them, then it becomes a very strong incentive to develop that and start rebuilding the city.

Josh: That makes perfect sense and I just want to interject here that I think this is the biggest difference between a politician and an economist because a politician tends to think about today and an economist tends to think about five to ten to twenty years down the road. They understand that incentives are what drive future prospect and growth. Whereas politicians are more about the barriers that are going to give them some kind of elation in the moment which gets them elected. So, I think that what you’re bringing in here is something totally new to the population [and the political discourse]. They’ve never been talked to like this—about incentives and stuff like that, not in a real way. So what you’re saying here is just an outstanding platform for improvement and for protecting people who want to buy [and improve] property.

Bill: Well, that’s what we want to do: protect those property rights so people have an incentive and so they won’t feel afraid to improve their property and then change the taxes so they have an incentive to do it. And we could get these decaying cities moving again. But if you always stick with the, you know, you give a subsidy to this developer for putting up a hundred houses here and another subsidy down the street to somebody for doing something else; particularly to give subsidies to people putting in a retail development just outside downtown and that sucks all the life out of downtown and so you have musical developments moving around, each one of them subsidized. And you end up with just a different pattern of decay. You haven’t changed the decay.

Josh: I think Columbus is a good example of that. I mean, you look at Easton and Tuttle Mall and Polaris Parkway; they’ve sucked all of that vibrancy away from downtown. And not that downtown is suffering by any means, but it has definitely changed the way that people function within the city.

Bill: Right and, of course, we see it in Cleveland where the population is actually declining and none of these plans to reverse the decline have done anything.

Now, of course the other problem with trying to get people to live in the city is the school problem and we do know how to address that but it’s not very popular with the teachers’ unions.

Josh: [Laughing] Yeah, I know that but is there anything else you wanted to talk about in terms of taxes before we move on into education?

Bill: Well, we do have to cut those income taxes. The Ohio maximum rate was 7½%. It’s come down a bit now; it’s down to about 7% but our neighbors are at 3½ % so we certainly can’t survive that kind of competition.

Josh: Right. Right.

INTERJECTION:

Josh: I want to apologize to all the listeners here and Bill as well because at this point in the conversation, my Audioblog software actually failed me and I lost about five minutes of the conversation in which we talked about Bill’s amazing educational plan which is geared towards putting out a certain amount of money for each child and allowing parents to make the choice of where the children want to go to school. I’ll put information in the actual transcript [CLICK HERE to read the specifics of the Peirce Educational plan and click on the "Parents and Children link in the yellow box] with a link to Bill’s site where he explains this in detail. But it basically allows the parents to become the leverage in the market and drive true changes in the educational system which we all know that we need badly.

It’s obvious that the Republican and Democratic strategy of just throwing money at the educational pot just results in lawyers and special interest groups fighting over the money while, ironically, the children are the only ones getting left behind. So it’s time for a true change and Bill’s plan is something very special so make sure you check that out.

And according to this 8/17/2006 Columbus Dispatch article, Ted Strickland has no Education Plan. Guess who gets my vote on the issue?

But I did manage to save a little of the end of our conversation, so we’ll go to that now.

END INTERJECTION


Bill: I’ve just written an educational policy statement called A Child-Centered Educational Finance. So we’re focusing on the child and in this Child-Centered Educational Finance, the base amount is about $6,000 and then you subtract what the community can generate from its own taxes. So, a rich school district like Beechwood here in the Cleveland area has just a huge amount of property per student and so it’s own contribution [per student] far exceeds the $6,000.

But if you take some poor community, particularly in the Appalachian regions, the poor rural districts—they can’t generate much property taxes because they just can’t generate much property per student and so they’d get the bulk of the $6,000. Under my revised scheme, now, the amount that the state would have given the local school district is available then to the parents to shift it to another school if that would do better for their child.

Josh: It makes perfect sense to me. I’ve always been of the opinion that the public library is the true institute of public learning anyway because you can literally walk in there and look for any subject you want and find it. It sounds to me like your plan is just right in line with that philosophy. Choice drives change.

Bill: Well, it is and I think the public library is a good example because we know that if we can teach those kids to read and write and do arithmetic, they can learn anything else they need to know in the library or with access to the Internet. I mean the materials are out there and it isn’t very expensive to teach reading writing and arithmetic. Why is it that we spent so much more in the last twenty years on education and test scores have fallen.

Josh: Sure. And in addition to this, with parents choosing the avenue of their children’s education; one would think that would kind of build them up to begin participating more in the education of their child so that reading, writing and arithmetic would be second nature by the time their child even got to school.

Bill: Yeah, that certainly is another benefit of this—once the parents are involved in selecting a school, particularly if they have to put some of their own money in to bolster the amount coming from the state then they will certainly put some pressure on the kid. And everybody acknowledges that involved parents are very, very important for education.

Josh: Absolutely. I’d be much more willing to dig into my pocket if I could see the direct influence that it was having on my child rather than to vote for a levy or something for my community.

Bill: Right.

Josh: So, I think it’s brilliant and I think it’s going to go over very well when people hear what you’re really saying on that issue.

Bill: It goes over well with everybody except the …

Josh: …the Teachers’ Unions…

Bill: …yeah, the Teachers’ Unions, yeah…

Josh: I imagine there’ll be a lot of them out there just clenching up and walking a little bit uptight when they hear that but, you know what, I’m sorry but the public’s will is going to speak in the end.

Bill: Yeah, some of them get practically violent. Now, that doesn’t apply to teachers themselves because a lot of teachers recognize the problems of the educational system. And the good teachers, of course, have nothing to fear because there will always be jobs for good teachers.

Josh: Sure. Absolutely. Absolutely. Okay, well let’s go ahead and wrap this up. I know you’re a busy man and you’ve got a campaign to drive on. But I did want to ask you one last question: What is the one book you’ve read in your life that had a profound influence on your thinking, your relationships with other people, and why should everyone listening to this read that book?

Bill: Well, this may seem a little trite but I think it’s Wealth of Nations by Adam Smith. It’s a wonderful book. Most people don’t get very far into it but Smith had this wonderful feeling for how people really act, how they really behaved, and he developed this wonderful system and description, not just of the economy but of society also. And every time I go back and read parts of it; I think, “Why did we bother to write anything after that?” It was all here.

Josh: So you think it’s still applicable to this day?

Bill: Oh, it certainly is.

Josh: Excellent. You know, I can honestly say I have not read that but Easton Press offers a nice $200 version of it that’s hand-made leather and everything so you know what? It’s on my list.

And I want to thank you for your time and your honesty here. And as a private citizen who is registered as an independent voter, I am pleased to extend my vote to you this coming November and I hope that all my fellow Ohio citizens are intelligent enough to actually listen to your positions, consider your talents, skills and your background and extend their vote to you as well.

Bill: Well thank you very much, Josh for your vote and for the opportunity.

Josh: Well thank you and we’ll see you out on the campaign trail. I’ll be rooting for you.

Bill: Great!

Josh: Thank you Bill and we’ll talk to you soon.

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August 15, 2006

Tit-for-Tat: Is Meditation a Good Weapon Against Global Chaos?

by Joshua Minton



One of my favorite things in life is rediscovering a great book. When I sink my teeth into new ideas that are actually reinforced ideas I was introduced to years before, my mind whirs in a way that it doesn't under any other stimuli. Take, for example, the magnificent chapter in Carl Sagan's book Billions and Billions: Thoughts on Life and Death at the Brink of the Millennium titled "The Rules of the Game" where Sagan talks about Game Theory as a basis for world politics.

He asks the valid question of who is thinking twenty years down the line. Despite my recent ranting on the subject of war and how it truly is an act of the human animal and not the human being; there is a time and place where war is absolutely necessary which then means that our animal natures are absolutely necessary to our ultimate survival. But shouldn't there be a point where long-term execution overtakes the myopic gesture?

And by long-term strategy, I mean a world of real peace where human beings compete in the realm of ideas and in marshaling the best within their minds and hearts and applying that greatness to the limited resources of the Earth and the other moons, planets, asteroids and chemical matter of our solar system to truly bring the highest standard of living to every future human being. Isn't that the noblest goal we can aspire to achieve as a species?

I have to be honest, I don't like to talk in terms of plurality when I talk about humanity. I believe that culture is an abstraction from the measure of true freedom which only lies in the mind of the individual human being. The mind is the storehouse of memory and memory is the very substance of our identities; it is the essence of our greatness and at the same time the very genesis of our separation from one another. Memory is the medium by which we operate as independent entities in time and space and when memory ends and the mind is totally silent and quiet in the moment, something very special happens.

What happens to a mind that is no longer operating through time? Time is the movement of memory. When the mind is in motion, it is creating time, like human lungs create Carbon Dioxide upon exhale; and this time smear is always of the past never the present moment. Five senses deliver information from the present moment to the mind and the mind interprets that information and produces an image which is delivered after the moment has passed and the image dictates reality. Our reality is always based on the past, never the present moment. All of our science, all of our ideals, all of our self images are all of the past and can never relate directly to the present moment. This is a fact. Don't take my word for it. See it yourself. Sit with it and the truth will wash over you like an Alabama rain storm.

So what happens to a brain that has seen this fact that it is always of the past and can never be related to the present moment?

What are you supposed to do with a fact? You can deny it but that is just the mind in movement again, creating the time smear. The attempt to deny is a denial of the fact itself and cannot lead one to truth.

Eventually, the mind which is serious, the mind which yearns for freedom and sees this fact, sits with it, accepts it; that mind becomes very quiet, still, stops moving in the moment, stops producing images in a futile attempt to capture the reality of the present moment. And when that mind stops moving altogether in the moment an enormous transformation takes place, something outside of time; time is the mind in motion and the mind has seen the fact that it is useless to attempt to define reality in the present moment because it is always of the past and this mind is now standing still in reverence of that fact and is therefore fully engaged in the present moment without past reference or projection into an idealistic future (which is still of the past--are you following me here?).

That transformation is what all the religions promise but none have ever delivered upon. This is because they are moving in the realm of time which is always of the past. Religions are constellations of metaphoric images and quaint rituals which are supposed to lead one beyond the words, beyond the ideas, beyond the images (graven or mental), to the promised land of peace and absolute freedom. But how many religions say, "Our metaphors and rituals are the best and anyone who doesn't agree is damned to hell (another image) and take this sword in your gut, this musket blast in your chest, this stake to burn on, this cannon fire, this airplane in your building or this smart bomb for your troubles, you dirty heathen"?

Finding this still point is the essence of proper meditation and is the core message that Jiddu Krishnamurti taught about his whole life. He spoke of an absolute freedom beyond time and the constructs of man which populate time and in which the human mind and spirit is bogged down into like a quagmire of divinity.

Inside that still point lies the future of mankind and the human race. Inside that nexus of the swirling moment, always in motion and which never capitulates or bends to the feeble will of man in his attempts to saddle it and ride, lies the hope of future generations of our ancestors who are screaming to us from the very genetic code bursting from our cells, saying, "Please become stewards of this world and each other because we want to live. We Want To Live. WE WANT TO LIVE!"

ASSIGNMENT:
Which of the "rules" in the picture above do you think we are currently using to fight the War on Terror? Which of them is more likely to produce the outcome of establishing a peaceful world? Are they the same rule? If not, why not? Leave a comment or send me an e-mail to let me know what you think.

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    August 14, 2006

    Killing the Common Enemy: Why Cultural Suicide is the Only Solution to the War on Terror

    by Joshua Minton

    I remember the Native American Women Studies class I took my senior year of college, taught by Linda Pertusati at Bowling Green State University who was actually present at the Wounded Knee incident in February, 1972 when the FBI busted in and shot up two AIM protesters, one of them a Vietnam veteran. Linda was most definitely not a Bush supporter but then again neither was I at the time.

    And I remember there was this dude in the class, a smart handsome dude, who had just signed up to go officer in the Marine Corps and during one of the discussions, I jumped up on my firebrand soapbox and said something to the effect, "I don't know why all these protesters waste their time blaming politicians for war; it's the soldier who makes the choice to go to war that's to blame for the fighting."

    It was an incendiary remark and brought a firestorm of debate where even the lefties in the class were defending the soldier as being just a pawn victim in the political game of global politics. But the handsome dude remained mostly quiet through the whole discussion, he kept something to himself. I still wonder to this day why he held back.

    I'm sure he's seen his share of deserts these seven years since that class.

    This incident should give you an idea of how radically my core values and political viewpoint has changed these past seven years. But I am still fiercely independent and I believe that the individual human being is the only effective measure of freedom and that anyone who speaks about freedom like it was a collective condition is a lying god damn asshole who is either looking for your vote, your money, or your blood.

    And I can understand the rage that many people feel in the world today. I imagine it's the same rage that our ancient ancestors felt after running up a tree to escape a vicious mountain lion or the rage that Bill Clinton felt when he had to justify himself and deny a blowjob, something most Presidents before him probably considered a fringe benefit of the title.

    But I could never express my understanding like Bukowski, a true master of the common man's poetry, did in his poem "The Difficulty of Breathing:"
    I can
    almost understand
    why
    people
    leap
    from
    bridges.

    I even
    understand
    in part those
    people who
    arm themselves
    and
    slaughter their
    friends and innocent
    strangers.

    I am
    not exactly
    in sympathy
    with them
    and I decry
    their reckless behavior
    but I can
    understand
    the
    ultimate
    undeniable
    persistent
    force of
    their misery.

    the horrific violent
    failure
    of any one
    of us
    to live properly
    says to me that
    we are all equally
    guilty
    for every human
    crime.
    there are
    no
    innocents.

    and if there is
    no
    hell,
    those who coldly
    judge these
    unfortunates
    will
    create
    one for us
    all.
    That last stanza hit me like a kick in the balls when I first read it. Isn't that what has happened to the mind of man-aren't we living in a mental and emotional hell as a species? Sure, there are pits of happiness. I love my wife and my children and my family and friends and I'm even fond of a few of my co-workers. But if I'm being honest with you; once I go beyond that circle of influence, where inside resides the people whose lives I effect and who in turn affect me, I see very little but statistics, complaints, and abstractions. Can I be honest with you and tell you that I'm pretty sure the notion that some Middle Easterner gets to call themselves free while living under the tyranny of Western corporate apartheid neither adds to or detracts from my own vision of freedom for myself?

    Can I be honest that way? Or do you want me to tell you that everything my country is doing is right? Or wrong? What would make you feel better?

    Maybe if I said that church is the answer? Pick a church, it makes no difference to me--they're all the same. Some kill with the notion of kindness and brotherly love and corporate slavery while others kill with old fashioned, stone your enemy, kill his wife and children and wash your weapons in the sea mentality. For my money, at least the latter is honest about it because it's all killing in the name of an idea which is lunacy to me because each of us are composed of ideas and notions. Every single one of us is a bundle of half-interpreted sensory stimuli which are somehow composited into a mental entity we foolishly fortify and project into some eternal being which lasts beyond the electrical sparks jumping neural gaps that produce the very memories we revere and worship like golden idols tossed into a burning bush and then turn around and murder by the millions through alcohol, cigarettes, and various drugs of escape.

    No, I'm sorry--I can't say that churches or dusty old books are the answer either. Nor can I say that armed rebellion of any type will solve any problems. Or terrorism, armed or mental--that won't do anything but exacerbate the problems we have and the common enemy we all face.

    I said something else in that Native American Women's Studies class, something even less popular than the blame the soldier not the war remark. I said that if American Indians (or whatever they want to be called nowadays) truly want to be free then they must release their attachment to their cultural identity and I took it three steps further and said the same thing applies to all minorities and to all majorities for that matter. Until human beings let go of the things they believe define them, true freedom will forever elude their grasp.

    We are engaged in a vicious war on the other side of the world and there is no easy solution because human beings at war are nothing more than animals, no matter how complicated and flowery the language they use to describe their tactics or their goals of engagement. And when we descend to the level of animals, we can still achieve much noble greatness but it remains the greatness of animals, beings concerned primarily with health, wealth, protecting progeny and securing victory over the enemy (pick an enemy, it's always "us and them" and they are always the monster).

    America has tried to commit suicide several times in our brief but fiery history. We barely held together as a country in the 1800 election, only the second we ever had. Andrew Jackson initiated a campaign against Native Americans that subsequent Presidents continued and which would make Hitler salivate over in terms of efficiency and efficacy in removing and liquidating the culture of an indigenous population. These are indisputable facts but they make me love my country no less. In fact, I don't believe you can truly love something until you see the monsters hidden behind its eyes.

    The Civil War forever destroyed America and continues to affect everything about us to this day--it is, in my opinion, the most important war ever fought by man against man. I believe this because for a brief moment, the human animal almost raised itself in war to the level of the human being.

    But America lived on.

    And on--through World Wars, through a sitting President being assassinated in a time of subtle intelligence war over which loomed nuclear annihilation. On through an ideological war which became vastly unpopular under the influence of a pervasive media which eventually came under the thumb of corporations who conglomerated into producing a cultural hegemony of half-thinking half-wits who elect Presidents like they elect the cutest singers on reality television shows.

    But we have never had a revolution that began and ended solely in the mind of the individual. We've never had a wave of true freedom sweep through the little universes that exist inside each of us. Freedom knows freedom and reaches out to embrace regardless of skin color, dialect, or the pontifical preference of deitous middlemen.

    A revolution that begins and ends in the mind of the individual is the only solution to the War on Terror and the only hope for saving us from the hell that those who coldly judge the unfortunates among us will surely create for us all.

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  • Read JD's posts (Part 1 and Part 2) about the time he went on a beer run in Arkansas and ended up on the front page of the newspaper as an attendant in the front row of a Klan rally (oops!). He has the quote of the day:
    That is one of the first times I got the lesson. Sometimes, it’s better to just go on and step in the shit instead of throwing your back out to keep from it.

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    If I Could Choose Any Celebrity to Endorse Boys Wear Pants...

    by Joshua Minton

    ...it would be Robert Downey Jr. You've gotta love this guy because he's like a raquetball--the harder you toss him down, the higher he bounces back up.

    He was born in New York and his father was a film director. He joined the cast of Saturday Night Live at the age of 20 but only lasted one sesaon. Everyone knows that he has a serious drug addiction that he's overcome time and again only to fall right back into but did you know that he seriously dated Sarah Jessica Parker back in the 80s?

    He was the asshole wing man in Weird Science, the gay literary agent in Wonder Boys, the reporter who gets shot down like a dog in Natural Born Killers, Charlie Chaplin and dozens of other roles that he delivered hammer blows of mastery to--the man is, quite simply, one of the finest actors of my generation.

    And I'm willing to bet that he got a lot of women through the sympathy vote who then promptly turned into stalkers and bored him because he's got that electric geek personality where women don't usually look twice at him but when the ones that do look a third time, they're hooked and drawn in by his tractor beam and promptly destroyed and sucked dry like standing water into a wet vac.

    So RDJ, I hope you read this some day and send me a real accolade that I can proudly place in my sidebar, something that says, "From one electric geek to another, I love your blog, J-Man."

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    August 12, 2006

    Death of the Party: How to Destroy American Politics by Amusing Ourselves to Death

    by Joshua Minton



    There's really weird shit going on in the world today. Krispy Kreme has gone out of business in Arizona and the editor of PlayStation Magazine is buying an XBOX 360 instead of a Playstation 3 this November. And people at MIT are figuring out how to make solar cells from spinach, plasma engines and fuel which comes from algae that eats greenhouse gases; while the citizens of Iraq are still figuring out how to set up a democracy run by corporations in the West and powered by people in a land that produces nothing of value but incendiary devices used to blow up other human beings because the pronunciation of their deity is off.

    Yeah, weird shit is happening.

    Joe Lieberman, the man who ran for Vice President of the Democratic Party was just thrown out of the same party on his ear and Dick Cheney, the Vice President who villified and beat him only six years ago effectively said that a vote for Lieberman's opponent was a vote for Al-Qaeda. Weird, man!

    And the Western Intelligence Agencies were able to pool their resources and skills to stop a massive bombing plot which involved peroxide-based explosives and blowing up planes flying from London to the US in mid-flight and would have killed an estimated 2,700 people. It's amazing what we can do when we pay attention to our environment. Five years ago, we would have been hard-pressed to work together so fluidly with Great Britain and I praise the work of these agencies and the thousands of men and women who stopped this horrific attack at the eleventh hour. It was a project management war on both sides and it looks like our side won--this time. And I write the words "this time" with a heavy heart because I don't like to propagate the notion that we must all live in fear each day because I believe that weltanschauung is very dangerous to individual freedom; I think it opens doors that we are all better off when left closed.

    And as much as I credit the authorities to taking down this recent plot; I still have to give love to my conspiracy-theory homies, many of whom are stone-cold convinced that this whole thing was cooked up to draw pressure off Bush and the Israelis for the Lebanon campaign which is gearing up for an even bigger Israeli ground offensive in the coming days. I give love to the black helicopter Bilderberg people because it's a great big world that gets squeezed by gravity from all angles and the wobble of the Earth equals the changes in seasons. It takes all types to keep the Earth in its wobble--remember that tip from Uncle Josh.

    And so, I've probably purchased my last bottle of 97-cent hyrdogen peroxide over the counter and have drunk my last 20-oz Aquifina on a domestic commercial flight but 2,700 people are alive today when they'd probably be dead if I still retained those privileges so I say Shalom. I say a salaam a leckem. I say Good day my Christian brother and Put it in gear, motherfucker cause' it's time to keep rollin'. If the end of the world is coming, I say let it be weird. Let it be magical. Let's have some mystery back. If we're going to slit our own stupid god damn throats, can't we at least amuse ourselves in the process like a deadly game of "Make Me Laugh?"

    And I say good riddance to Joe Lieberman and all Republicans and Democrats and the shit eating politicians all around the world--the ones who started this war, the ones who supported it, and the ones before them who set up the world stage and backed my generation into a corner where we had to fight or face imminent destruction from an enemy without a country and who could be anyone, anywhere, at any time.

    I pray that this Lieberman loss is the first trickle in the dam of collective power that these two American political parties have wielded over the individual American citizen for nearly 140 years now. I can see a crack of light for the Independent parties and I hope they're smart enough to take advantage of it. I know that I'll be voting for Bill Peirce, the Libertarian candidate for Governor here in Ohio, this November and I would love to see other states electing their Libertarians and their Greens and their Dykes of the American Revolutions or whatever.

    Let's just make things interesting again here in America like it was under Andrew Jackson. Let's get some independent, bullets in your chest and scars on your cheek, type of leaders in the big chair; men and women who are willing to kick a little ass in their own backyard before they head off to the lands of sand at the first sign of domestic turbulence.

    Is a little entertainment too much to ask?

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    August 11, 2006

    The Traitor and the Liar: Revisiting Fahrenheit 911

    by Joshua Minton

    I was probably one of the only Bush voters in Ohio who paid money to go see Fahrenheit 911 at the theater but pay to go see I did. I detested Michael Moore at the time. I believed that he was out to destroy this country, this president, and undermine the War on Terror.

    But my heart has softened toward him in the last two years--not that I'm a fan now by any means. Well, let me qualify that--I am a fan of his film making. This man is a top rate propagandist and this movie should rank right there next to Triumph of the Will as the best incendiary political films of all time.

    But I haven't watched the movie since I saw it in the theater, although I picked up a used copy for a few bucks shortly after the last presidential election. Well, I finally got a hankering to revisit the piece and I have to say that I was much more impressed this time around, now that the 2004 election is over and all those emotions have simmered down.

    I still believe that the first half of the movie is much stronger than the second half. Moore makes valid connections between the Bush family and the Saudis; the point about the Bin Ladens being transported out of the country when all other aviation had been halted is some shady business. And when you get into how much Saudi Arabia has profited from and how much they own of America (roughly 6% of the country at the time the film was made according to the film)--you have to wonder who (or what) is pulling the strings behind the Bush presidency and the War on Terror.

    It is outrageous that the US Patriot Act was passed without most of the Congressmen even reading the bill (not to denigrate its effectiveness) and I still think it's a bit shady that Bush waited so long to stop reading with the children to get into War Mode but that's really all water under the bridge.

    It is what it is.

    But really, as a conspiracy theory, the whole movie is rather tame when you put it next to books like Crossing the Rubicon: The Decline of the American Empire at the End of the Age of Oil by Michael C. Ruppert, a book which contends that Bush and the Neo-Cons engineered 9/11 as a ruse to place the last remaining carbon-based fossil fuels into US and Western hands.

    But as a didactic piece of American art, Fahrenheit 911 still holds its own and is well worth engaging if only once. Personally, I think politicians and political artists are hatched from the same egg. They are all like beautiful whores in a dance club; the only word they understand from others is YOU and the only thought they think personally is ME.

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    August 10, 2006

    How We Can Get Leadership Back in America

    by Joshua Minton

    Regardless of your political affiliation, you have to have core values in order to interact in society. The core values of the dirt bags of the world are to take advantage of situations and people in order to advance their own interests but these should not be the people who are in positions of leadership. And anymore it seems like leadership in America is more reliant on authority than responsibility. We hear the President, Congressmen, and Senators talk incessantly about responsibility while all the while relying on their authority to be taken seriously while they turn around and act exactly contrary to being responsible. And I know I'm painting with a broad brush here, but the cliche holds true because it is generally applicable--politicians are largely power-hungry do-nothings who talk a bunch of bullshit while many continue to struggle to string together a small type of happiness.

    Sure, there has to be the threat of and even the use of force but what happens when force is the only means the leaders you have know? I'll tell you, at that point, the greatest weapon against individual liberty becomes the placation of peace, the ethereal promise of a diplomatic solution which shores up the intentions of the warriors but effects the war over the opposite and alternative.

    The possibility of peace equals the reality of war. Peace is not a goal to be achieved; rather, it is the absence of conflict in the moment and when you have leaders who either don't understand this simple philosophical truth or understand it all too well and ignore it at the peril of the entire species, you have an evolutionary obstacle the size of the Chixclub asteroid which obliterated a species of life which had existed for hundreds of millions of years compared to our paltry few million.

    But there is still leadership left in the world and there always has been. Academics and high brow scientists and philosophers have been made an enemy of the people in the press these past eight years, but let us not forget that these were the individuals who, in 1990, penned the following appeal to the religious leaders of the world community:
    The Earth is the birthplace of our species and, so far as we know, our only home. When our numbers were small and our technology feeble, we were powerless to influence the environment of our world. But today, suddenly, almost without anyone noticing, our numbers have become immense and our technology has achieved vast, even awesome, powers. Intentionally or inadvertently, we are now able to make devastating changes in the global environment--an environment to which we and all the other beings with which we share the Earth are meticulously and exquisitely adapted.

    We are now threatened by self-inflicted, swiftly moving environmental alterations about whose long-term biological and ecological consequences we are still painfully ignorant--depletion of the protective ozone layer; a global warming unprecedented in the lat 150 millenia; the obliteration of an acre of forest every second; the rapid-fire extinction of species; and the prospect of a global nuclear war that would put at risk most of the population of the Earth. There may well be other such dangers of which, in our ignorance, we are still unaware. Individually and cumulatively they represent a trap being sent for the human species, a trap we are setting for ourselves. However principled and lofty (or naive and shortsighted) the justifications may have been for the activities that brought forth these dangers, separately and together they now imperil our species and many others. We are close to committing--many would argue we are already committing--what in religious language is sometimes called Crimes against Creation.

    By their very nature these assaults on the environment were not caused by any one political group or any one generation. Intrinsically, they are transnational, transgenerational, and transideological. So are all conceivable solutions. To escape these traps requires a perspective that embraces the peoples of the planet and all the generations yet to come.

    Problems of such magnitude, and solutions demanding so broad a perspective, must be recognized from the outset as having a religious as well as a scientific dimension. Mindful of our common responsibility, we scientists--many of us long engaged in combating the environmental crisis--urgently appeal to the world religious community to commit, in word and deed, and as boldly as is required, to preserve the environment of the Earth.

    Some of the short-term mitigations of these dangers--such as greater energy efficiency, rapid banning of chlorofluorocarbons, or modest reductions in the nuclear arsenals--are comparatively easy and at some level are already under way. But other, more far-reaching, more long-term, more effective approaches will encounter widespread inertia, denial, and resistance. In this category are conversion from fossil fuels to a nonpolluting energy economy, a continuing swift reversal of the nuclear arms race, and a voluntary halt to world population growth--without which many of the other approaches to preserving the environment will be nullified.

    As on issues of peace, human rights, and social justice, religious institutions can here too be a strong force encountering national and international initiatives in both the private and public sectors, and in the diverse worlds of commerce, education, culture, and mass communication.

    The environmental crisis requires radical changes not only in public policy, but also in individual behavior. The historical record makes it clear that religious teaching, example, and leadership are powerfully able to influence personal conduct and commitment.

    As scientists, many of us have had profound experiences of awe and reverence before the Universe. We understand that what is regarded as sacred is more likely to be treated with care and respect. Efforts to safeguard and cherish the environment need to be infused with a vision of the sacred. At the same time, a much wider and deeper understanding of science and technology is needed. If we do not understand the problem, it is unlikely we will be able to fix it. Thus there is a vital role for both religion and science.

    We know that the well-being of our planetary environment is already a source of profound concern in your councils and congregation. We hope this Appeal will encourage a spirit of common cause and joint action to help preserve the Earth.
    A response to this Appeal on the Environment was sent back and was signed by spiritual leaders from 83 countries.
    We are moved by the Appeal's spirit and challenged by its substance. We share its sense of urgency. This invitation to collaboration marks a unique moment and opportunity in the relationship of science and religion.

    Many in the religious community have followed with growing alarm reports of threats to the well-being of our planet's environment such as those set forth in the Appeal. The scientific community has done humankind a great service by bringing forth evidence of these perils. We encourage continued scrupulous investigation and must take account of its results in all our deliberations and declarations regarding the human condition.

    We believe the environmental crisis is intrinsically religious. All faith traditions and teachings firmly instruct us to revere and care for the natural world. Yet sacred creation is being violated and is in ultimate jeopardy as a result of long-standing human behavior. A religious response is essential to reverse such long-standing patterns of neglect and exploitation.

    For these reasons, we welcome the Scientists' Appeal and are eager to explore as soon as possible concrete, specific forms of collaboration and action. The Earth itself calls us to new levels of joint commitment.

    It's time for a change in leadership. It's time for the people of this country to take the power back which has rightfully been endowed to them by divinity and by the framers of this national experiment who understood all too well, the dangers of autocratic power vested in the hands of the few.

    • You can begin by switching off the corporate television news.

    • You can continue by starting to pick up books again, both fiction and non-fiction to get all sides and possibilities of a story.

    • You can start meditating to find the still point inside you that so many religions promise but none of them ever deliver on.

    • You can begin reading blogs from people from all sides of the aisle and all different kinds of backgrounds. Start your own little society of ideas and then start your own blog (it's free) and give back to that society.

    • Express yourself creatively and openly online and you will be surprised at the return you will get for your investment.

    • Above all, appreciate the people around you, the ones who have an investment in your life--your family, friends, co-workers and neighbors (yes, even the assholes). You don't have to talk to them but appreciate them as people going through the same shit you are--being born from a mystery, growing up without a clue or a foothold in a social structure gone mad, and doomed to a life of physical and emotional decay with the inevitable ending of an egotistical sinking back into the mystery which surrounds us all.
    Leadership is a movement and it's kinetic. We must be able to recognize leadership in ourselves before we can spotlight and endorse it in others. And while the world leaders engaged in a brutal and vicious ideological war on the other side of the continent are leading us all somewhere; I am now in serious doubt that the destination will be either beneficial or preferable to the long-term interests of our species.

    NOTES:
    The above Appeal and its response came from Carl Sagan's book Billions and Billions: Thoughts on Life and Death at the Brink of the Millennium (Hardcover)

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    August 8, 2006

    BWP on Season 1 of Weeds

    by Joshua Minton

    Let's just get this out of the way--Mary Louise-Parker is hot in this show--way hotter than she was in Boys on the Side. OK, now we can get to the show.

    For those of you who've never heard of this show or thought Showtime was only putting out six AM titty flicks--you need to wise up because Showtime is the new HBO.

    This show is about a housewife with a sixteen year old on and a ten year old son whose husband just dropped dead one day while jogging. Well, in order to make ends meet, she starts dealing pot after her strung out brother-in-law with a heart too big and a head too small hooks her up with his connection, a black dude whose mother just happens to be one of the biggest pot dealing middlemen in California.

    Everyone smokes pot in this show; well, everyone except the pot dealing mother who obviously believes in the Notorious B.I.G/Scarface maxim that you never get high on your own supply.

    This show is funny, raw, real and surprisingly touching. I got sucked into the lives and personalities of these characters very quickly and couldn't recommend the first season more to you. In fact, go out and rent it right now (or sign up for the online Blockbuster pass and they'll mail them to you). There are ten episodes that go by far too fast and will leave you begging for more.

    Oh, and the end of the final episode is one of the best cliff hangers I've seen in a long time.

    Watch it for the weed alone--Kevin Nealon is priceless as a dope smoking city councilman who doubles as a CPA frontman for the pot dealing soccer mom.

    Man this show is great!

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    August 7, 2006

    Lovell E. Boner and the Case of the Senior Citizen’s Library Nipple by Joshua Minton

    by Joshua Minton

    Lovell Edward Boner was the greatest book thief in Sangamon County and he approached the university library desk with the same smugness his great-great-grandfather had with the slaves he oversaw in Georgia cotton fields.

    The library was a hundred and fifty two years old, illuminated like an Irish pub at midnight, and Lovell E. Boner (as he liked to introduce himself to women) was still wearing his $900 custom made sunglasses that bore a lazered imaged of himself smiling in each lens and were animated when struck by light. Smiling Boner morphed to smirking Boner and back again as long as the light remained.

    Boner also sported behind the neck earloop headphones whose mp3 emissions inspired him to sing along with the chorus of Snoop Doggy Dog’s opus "For My Niggaz and My Bitches." He passed quiet foursomes whispering in the sharp panic breaths of a Friday morning chemistry quiz.

    Halfway from the door to the desk, he pulled the loops from his ears and they hung blaring over his shoulders so everyone in his immediate proximity could “Thow theah muthafuggin hands in the a-yah” with him.

    Boner gripped the edge of the cherry wood desk as he inched up on it, swinging back and forward like a sling shot, putting his face inches from that of the reference room clerk who was reading the campus daily news and popping bubbles with her breath gum.

    Boner parted his lips, bared his teeth, and huffed hot breath in her face like someone in a commercial who just gargled with mouthwash.

    Her pupils were telescope lenses under a star dome sky and he was a supernova that drew her immediate attention to the horizon. Her face registered no emotion or muscle movement and her reaction was genetic.

    Can I help you?

    Boner smiled and pulled the sunglasses halfway down his nose. His eyes darted to the nametag.

    Yes, hehloohoH Janice. My name is Lovell E. Boner, nice to meet you.

    He plucked her first two fingers from the page she was reading and gave them a loose shake.

    I am interested in viewing a book in your antique collection and I would appreciate a comfortable room in which to purvey it.

    Janice replied in a tone of voice she normally reserved for phone call salesmen during dinner.

    What’s the book title?

    Boner nodded at her like accepting an overdue apology.

    This is a very rare book and the author was Hammil George Winslow.

    She bugged her eyes out at him and her voice coiled to a huff.

    What’s the title?

    Boner cleared his throat.

    The title of the book, Janice, is The Art of Nipple Sucking.

    He looked at her breasts as he spoke the title, smiled, and looked back to her face. He spoke to her as if he had just seen her naked at her request.

    The book was written in 1572 in what eventually became the Massachusetts Bay Colony…

    Her tone had become sales phone call at dawn.

    …Uh, I got it.

    Her eyes were still bugged out and the breath gum now hung stuck from her bottom lip like porno semen.

    He touched her elbow with his first two fingers now joined by a circling thumb on her upper forearm.

    Janice, this book was the authoritative text for almost two hundred years and is the first documented American experience with getting an infant to latch onto a nipple immediately following birth.

    The moment spiraled as they stared at each other. She was here on a work-study program. He was engaged in Grand Larceny at the paid bequest of a 56-year-old health insurance corporate CEO. Their circumstances were now intermingling in the contact of his rubbing thumb pad and the freckle tanned flesh of her upper forearm.

    The moment broke and she pulled away in revulsion and began attacking the keyboard of her reference computer with keystrokes. She forced herself to stare at the screen to avoid looking back at him. She did look up once out of disgusted curiosity. He winked at her and pushed the sunglasses back up the bridge of his nose.

    After typing exactly 47 characters, she asked him for ID and he snapped a driver’s license from his front pocket and held it an inch and a half from the bridge of her nose like an American Express commercial gone wrong.

    When she walked to the copy machine with his license, he stared at her puffed out butt cheeks muffled by the thick cotton skirt. Boner looked up to find himself caught by a steel-eyed old betty who eyed him with the knowledge of a father meeting the guy he knows is banging his daughter.

    He gripped the temple of his sunglasses and slid them down his nose, launching a dirty look that said, What the fuck are you looking at lady?

    She turned and huffed to the elevator, stopping only once to look at him with tightened eyes.


    Janice directed him to the fourth floor, handed him a permission slip, and turned her back on him when he bent to grab and kiss her hand.

    The elevator buzzer counted to four and the doors slid open to reveal a dark wood paneled room with an alabaster ceiling. There was a monstrous desk in the center mounted by the same old betty he had just scrapped eyes with.

    Boner took off his sunglasses and eyed her nametag.

    HehloohoH Betty.

    He tossed Janet’s permission slip on desk.

    I’ll take this book, Betty, and a cozy little room with a fireplace and an 18th century leather back wing chair to read it in.

    She stared at him for a moment and spoke with the exactitude and drained-of-bullshit tone that only someone at the very end of their life can pull off.

    You’re an asshole.


    She left to retrieve the book and returned to find Boner casually reviewing and finger-shuffling her desk papers.

    Here’s the book.

    He nodded again in the semi-DeNiro smile.

    Excellent.

    Boner snapped three times and finger waved her a summons for her to cross the room and hand him the book, which she did.

    He took the book from her and put the earloop headphones back, the mp3 player now leaking "Against the Wind" by Bob
    Seger.

    She stood next to him as he flipped to the fourteenth page and began scanning while fingertip soloing the first stanza of the Seger song on the desktop. He began singing, nothing left to burn and nothing left to prove.

    He licked his finger and thumb and flipped three more pages. Wish I didn’t know what I didn’t know then.

    He folded a corner of a page and shuffled on. He finally looked up and feigned surprise to find her still there. He shook his head back and forth in a contained motion of genuine curiosity when he spoke to her.

    What do you know about nipple sucking, Betty?


    He reached out and touched the cotton covered swell of her left breast with his left hand.

    She spun around and hunched away in recoil like the Germans were still bombing England. Boner profited from the violation by slipping the book into the back of his pants, increasing the value of their contents by $7,463.

    She picked up a sharpened pencil on the desk and lunged at him with the speed of an earthworm fleeing freeway traffic.

    He backed away from her, punched the elevator button and smiled when the doors opened immediately behind him. No one had used the elevator after 23:00 for the entire three weeks he performed observational research on the target and their immediate availability was an assumption his plan depended upon. The assumption paid off.

    He brushed aside her feeble sharpened graphite attack and pulled the stray wisps of white hair behind her right ear. She screamed and he slapped her face on a downstroke, forcing her to the ground in a crying, mumbling heap.

    Boner pulled the fire alarm next to the call button, backed into the elevator and punched the star button with the fluid motions of a rehearsed physical comedian in a primetime sitcom.


    None of the seventy three people in the library (including the rent-a-cop) noticed a man wearing sunglasses and earloop headphones exit the library with a rectangular load in his pants because the shrieking of the fire alarm had them all squinting their eyes and covering their ears in pain.

    Lovell E. Boner had struck again in the name of the righteous and wealthy who, because ridiculous tax laws drained all incentive from taking financial risks, allocated their abundant resources to acquiring every slob pleasure the people who worked for them could uselessly dream of one day owning for themselves.

    Lovell E. Boner, Knight of the Round Table that seats only one, walked square-ass into the parking lot darkness with the shrill fire alarm singing his crimes and triumphs behind him.


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    August 6, 2006

    The Three-Year Old in My Kitchen

    by Joshua Minton

    I said something the other day to my wife, something to the effect that I didn't think that human beings truly began an emotional education until they became parents.

    I mean if you think about it, almost all emotions that we go through up to that point are totally selfish--desire greed, jealousy, joy--all centered around winning, losing, and placating that image of ourselves in our mind which we think of as so indestructible but which is as flimsy and insubstantial as the social well wishes of a politician or a pezzonovante of the church (pick a church, any church).

    But when you become an engaged parent, meaning a parent who is both happy and directly involved in the raising of your child; then you have undertaken what will likely become an enormous emotional transformation.

    And it's fugging hard!

    Let me give you an example. The other day, I'm getting ready to go to work, going out the door actually. And since I take my son to daycare in the morning, I'm doing everything I can to get him ready and once he is, I ask him to sit on the couch and wait for me to collect all my shit.

    I go to the fridge to get some water, pour it, shut the door and the next thing I know, I get thumped in the head, hard, twice. We keep cook books up on top of the refrigerator on a shelf I've had for probably twenty years. The jostling of the refrigerator door unloosened them and down they came along with all the little magnets and about fifteen other books which fell around me like little curses from the sky.

    I am now officially three minutes past the deadline I have to leave the house by in order to make it to work on time.

    The shelf fell and cracked.

    That was it. I picked the shelf up over my head and smashed it to the ground. It shattered into about eight pieces. I started picking up books and chucking them on top of the refrigerator like hail mary passes on fourth down. I was a level three sea storm, smashing and destroying, venting and fuming.

    All the while, my son is sitting calm as can be, playing with his cars on the couch, totally oblivious to his father exploding in rage in the kitchen and abusing cookbooks which were only obeying the law of gravity.

    The three year old was in the kitchen screaming and the old man was on the couch playing in quiet meditation.

    And this was the thought that drew me out of my delirium of rage...and I started laughing. The irony of the moment put everything into perfect focus and all the rage dissipated like Mel Gibson's Oscar chances this year.

    There are so many things that we learn as human beings when we interact, guide, and get lead by our children as they grow into adults who will in turn learn the subtler and more important emotional lessons from their own children. And in many ways, there are like little mirrors for us to judge the effectiveness or harmfulness of our behaviors on others.

    And they can serve as litmus tests for the choices we make. Often I think, How would I explain this to my son if he were to ask me why I took this action?

    Human beings are born with the gift of choice and how we approach that gift makes all the difference when the sum comes out at the end of the equation.

    All that aside, it's still a dumb idea to put cookbooks on top of the damn refrigerator.

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    August 5, 2006

    When Stephen Hawking Talks, You'd Better Listen, Puss...

    by Joshua Minton




    Hat tip to Fantastic Bastard

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    August 3, 2006

    Send Someone You Love (or Hate) a Voicemail from Samuel L. Jackson

    by Joshua Minton

    In one of the most genius marketing techniques I've ever seen, you can send personalized voicemails from Samuel L. Jackson to all your friends and co-workers where you'll really be advertising his new movie Snakes on a Plane. I sent five voicemails to people I work with alone.

    Genius.

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    August 2, 2006

    Sinking Deeper Into Tyranny: On The Latest Attempt to Destroy Individual Freedom In America

    by Joshua Minton



    There are three things you can't bullshit me on.

    1. Religion: Because I know that it's all bullshit, every single snotty drop is all about securing power over another group of people by supplanting your paradigm over theirs. Religion has nothing to do with what the word God is supposed to be pointing toward and anyone who believes that The Bible is the literal word of God or that people rise from the dead and ascend to heaven when even at the speed of light their bodies wouldn't even be out of our galaxy in 2,000 years not to mention the hundred billion other galaxies; well those people are just flaming idiots.

    2. That Marijuana is Illegal Because it's Dangerous: This is bullshit of the highest stench and order. I treasure every human being that I ever shared a pipe, joint, bong, blunt or brownie with and every one of them were human beings just reaching out to other human beings in the moment, making a sacred connection that would have been socially impossible without the ritualistic tool of the flaming herb being passed between them. So the government can take its fake ass phony War on Drugs and stick it up its tight ass. It's about control, pure and simple and it stinks to the heaven which is just a figment of their imaginations anyway.

    3. When Governments Become Tyrannies: I have studied two particular periods of history deeply--The American Revolutionary Period between 1763-1883 and the rise and fall of National Socialism in Germany 1920 - 1945. The reason I study both of these periods is because you cannot find a more diametrically opposed group of passionate and talented individuals who conspired to do both great good and great evil. Both periods have much to teach us about freedom and tyranny.
    And guess what folks? We are slipping dangerously close to great evil in this country. I could not believe what I was reading when I read the Washington Post article today by R. Jeffrey Smith titled "White House Proposal Would Expand Authority of Military Courts."

    Get this--since the Supreme Court put the kibosh on the military tribunal system which had been in place since shortly after 9/11/2001; the Bush Administration and the Department of Defense in particular went back to the drawing board (or went into the deepest dungeon of the Pentagon to consult the black mirror like Nostradamus did) and came up with one of the most vicious attempts to destroy individual liberty since the Nuremberg Race Laws of Nazi Germany, circa 1935.

    The first thing you should know is that these new types of military trials would include "people who are not members of al-Qaeda or the Taliban and are not directly involved in acts of international terrorism" and would "allow the secretary of defense to add crimes at will to those under the military court's jurisdiction."

    This basically means that the Sect of Death (I mean Sec of Def) would have carte blanche to remove any citizen's liberty at will and try them in a court outside the purview of the United States Constitution.

    Oh, but it gets worse:
    ...defendants would lack rights to confront accusers, exclude hearsay accusations, or bar evidence obtained through rough or coercive interrogations. They would not be guaranteed a public or speedy trial and would lack the right to choose their military counsel, who in turn would not be guaranteed equal access to evidence held by prosecutors.
    And guess what else, we wouldn't even have a right to be present at our own trial under this court if it deemed our absence necessary to protect national security.

    Excuse me a moment while I roll the moldy corpse of Thomas Jefferson back over. I think the obelisk covering his grave just cracked.

    As if this weren't enough, the Sec of Def would have the authority to detain and make someone disappear for 25 different crimes (the article didn't name what these were) but also included a provision which allowed for more crimes to be added to the list on an as needed basis.

    The article includes a quote from John D. Hutson, "the Navy's top uniformed lawyer from 1997 to 2000" in which he says:
    the rules would evidently allow the government to tell a prisoner: "We know you're guilty. We can't tell you why, but there's a guy, we can't tell you who, who told us something. We can't tell you what, but you're guilty."
    And as a final coup de grace to individual freedom, the court would allow and encourage hearsay as a primary factor in rendering its verdict. This means that the douche bag you put in his place can now weasel up behind you, spread a few well-placed lies and land you with a black bag over your head and electrodes clamped to your testicles while someone tells you that the one light you are seeing is actually three.

    Is Atlas Shrugging yet? Jesus, who and where is John Gault when you need him?

    And sorry, I forgot; where a normal Constitutional Court takes 12 jurors to render a death verdict--this court would only require 5.

    So, where does this leave us? In the movie JFK by Oliver Stone (one of the finest pieces of American cinema ever made irregardless of how sound the assassination theory was); Jim Garrison said, "Is a government worth protecting when it lies to its people?"

    And in the Wachowski brothers' masterpiece, V for Vendetta, the anti-hero said, "People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people." This is true and they are--so much so that they are finally taking off both gloves and throwing out that all-too-familiar bait of safety, order, and security for the golden jewel of freedom we each keep embezzled within our hearts and minds, precious treasures of liberty which can never be seized but only given away by the ignorant and unworthy.

    The Law is a collective deference of the individual right to protect one's life and property from being infringed upon by another human being. When The Law begins making demands on the lives and property of others at the expense of the freedom to exercise both, then the government which puts forth and enforces that law has become a lethal tyranny to the freedom of the individual human being and woe be to any man or group of men who attempts to chain the heart of the true American patriot because they are playing with matches in the dark next to a powder keg that will unleash hell fire upon them if they keep fucking around with powers and paradigms they are too childish of spirit and ignorant of mind to understand.

    Write your representatives. Tell them to shoot down this bullshit law like Dick Cheney takes out Texas lawyers making bird calls.

    I voted for Bush because I wanted to see the government swing back the other way after the decadence of the Clinton years but enough is enough already. Human history has barely survived past tyrannical governments that viewed their citizens as timbers and fodder for the fires of war and the endless grind of industry. Enough is enough.

    It's time to pull back on the reins before the horses run free and our little carriage gets smashed to bits at the bottom of the deep ravine that is always there, calling and waiting for our broken bones and failing screams.

    There is still time to stop this...


    ...but not much.


    NOTES:
    • The first picture is me sitting on Thomas Jefferson's back porch from the year 2004
    • The second picture is Patrick Henry giving a speech outside the Palace in Colonial Willamsburg (the coolest place in America)

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    August 1, 2006

    You Must See V for Vendetta

    by Joshua Minton

    I deliberately held off watching this movie until it came out on video. First of all, it's the Wachowski brothers. Second of all, it's about a single terrorist who destroys a tyrannical government so evil.

    This is one hell of a fantastic film and if you're not watching it tonight, you'd better damn sure be watching it tomorrow. It's based on a comic book that came out back in the late 80s but which has had the film rights collecting dust for almost fifteen years.

    All I can say is--excellent film. Excellent message. Viva la revolution!



    People should not be afraid of their government. Governments should be afraid of their people.

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    Why We Fight

    by Joshua Minton

    Folks, I could wax on all day about the philosophy of peace and how it is always preferable to war. But when you watch and listen to the 911 call from a man on the 105th floor of Tower 2 as the tower collapses...this is why we must continue to fight until the fighting is done and we can then wash our weapons in the sea.



    Hat Tip to Eszter Williams for the link.


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